Wednesday, March 30, 2005

not going...

i called my neighbor/aunt/second-cousin/whatever yesterday. i didn't lie: i explained that casey's leaving for las vegas and we're really behind on preparing our taxes for our accountant, so unfortunately we will have to pass.

she was very sweet as always. she really is so sweet and protective. she told my brother-in-law, rick [affectionately referred to as 'pizz' for his high-pitched, rapid-fire pronunciation of the word 'because'] that she loves him [accentuated by arm petting and cheek-pinching], but if he ever does anything to hurt my sister, she'll kill him. when my sister and rick were announced at the reception, they ran in and passed my sweet neighbor-relative. as they did, pizzy mcrizzowitz turned to her and slashed his throat with his index finger. it's pretty classic -- you can see it on their wedding video.

what did she ask me for a few minutes?

" you wvork?"

"...your house, do you own or do you rent? mpravo, koukla-mou!"

"'s your mamma? she live very far?"

"...your hazzband, yes? he goes to las vegas? how come you no go?"

"...marriage, it wvorks both ways, you know? you both need to be good."

i hope that a time comes when i can enjoy her hospitality and we can take advantage of our close proximity, but i know that tonight is not the night. casey knows that, too: he cheered when i told him we're not going. a full-on "yeaa!" with fists raised.


Casey said...

Let me not give your readers the wrong impression about yours truly.

I'm happy to attend any of your family engagements (even at the neckslashers house 'round the corner.)

Quite possibly what you mistook for a hooray re: the Big Fat Greek Dinner, was actually a hooray for Vegas. Yeah, that's it...

That said, I'm always happy to spend time with your family, and will always support any decision to spend time with any and all of them. God knows mine can be work too!

Thank you for your time. Please press 7 to disconnect.

p said...

i know you'd go with me, bun', if i really wanted to go, but i also know you know it wouldn't be very comfortable or redeeming.

i am excited for an evening of going out to dinner together, going to the grocery store together, and doing our goddamn taxes together. we will accomplish far more and make the evening worthwhile!

p said...

[this post was from my mom, which i have edited slightly to remove last names.]

Casey - always the diplomate.

Let me give you an example of what goes on in the brain of one who has been there and done that.

I have, for many years, been very close friends with my sister-in-law, Stella, but hesitate to continue a relationship with her because of all the family drama. Once you have put yourself on the outside of the drama loop, you really don't want to get entangled again.

I think that it's important to remain pleasant and civil, but a whole night of it?......NO THANKS.